Blue and Broken

Pick up your heart

blue and broken

and entrust it to Me.

I will mend it

I will caress it

I will never misuse it.

Man can be so careless

with the fragile

but I created you.

For Myself

to be a light

to move mountains.

I will capture those tears

and clutch them to My heart

as pure joy.

I will embrace you

you will embrace the promise

and together

we will build My Kingdom.

Today I made Ice Tea…sun tea to be exact.  I chose the correct glass pitcher, filled it with RO water and added the perfectly picked tea bags to create a wonderful blend of sun drenched tea.  I set it out on the porch, covered so no bugs could get in, and left it to boil.  As I turned to come back in the house I was thankful for the grace of God.  For the love of Christ.  For a wonderful earthly family, husband and friends.  It’s been a long road for this girl.  There was a time I would think, ‘Here I am, covered in grace, loved by the Only One that matters, bound for greatness in His eyes and yet I have no love for myself.’  Struck down by words as a child, I fought a life tormented with insecurities.

I have my father’s feet; lovely on my father, not so attractive on me.  The infamous Venus di Milo second toe stretching beyond the first toe is apparently unattractive except on a Greek goddess.  I have my mother’s ankles and beautifully developed dancer legs, but in elementary school they are tagged ‘bird legs’. 

When I was 8 years old I had a friend who forever teased me about my ankle’s being too skinny and my toes too long.  And so I spent many years before and after the flash dance era wearing my socks scrunched down around my ankles and closed-toe shoes.  I was a faux pas waiting to happen.  My father would tell me that my ankles were not skinny, but shapely, and that Venus de Milo’s second toe was beautifully captured in sculpture.  But the voice of my ‘friend’ rang louder in my ears than the voice of my father who loved me more than any other earthly person.   

I began to see other flaws; one eye smaller than the other, one lip higher, one imperfectly formed eyebrow, barrenness… those are the things that shaped the way I felt about myself.  I’m not alone in this.  My younger brother faced much insecurity because he struck out as he came up for the winning run when he was a little boy.  There are the abused, the disabled, and the unwanted; all crying out for encouragement.  But sometimes a word isn’t enough.  What I’ve discovered as I walk with the Lord is that we must inhabit the belief that we are created BY God in HIS image!  How beautiful is the Face of He who sent His son in propitiation for our sins.

Though we are a fallen race, and must watch that fine line between walking in humility while knowing that we are Kings and Queens in His eyes, we must not allow others to determine the assurance in which we move through life.  1John 4 tells us we must love one another, for love springs from God and that we must know and understand the love God cherishes for us.  

“God is love and he who dwells and continues in love dwells and continues in God and God dwells and continues in him.  In this, love is brought to completion and attains perfection with us that we may have confidence for the Day of Judgment because as he is so are we in this world”.   

We must first love ourselves.  Now when I look in the mirror, rather than seeing a distorted view of the world’s image, I focus on the words of Song of Solomon 4:7, "You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you."  You are beautiful in the eyes of your Beholder!