I have more wrinkles than energy. I also have more
wisdom. I have aches and pains where I used to have muscle. I also love harder.
I say things like “the kids these days” and “when I was that age”. I’m also
able to laugh at myself for sounding like my parents and my grandparents.
I’m less tolerant of drama, attention grabbing, and
system twisting while finding myself more merciful toward those attempting to
cope during a rough time in our world.
I strive less to wait on God. I am more patient. I
have learned to stand on His promises rather than run after my own desires.
I still want what I want when I want it, but have learned to ask first
and be ok with ‘not right now’.
I have idiosyncrasies that at one time would have
made me blush but now I don’t even notice. I have lost my grandparents, Aunts
and Uncles, friends, my sister, a beloved stepmom and husband; but my sweet
parents are both very much alive and healthy and I've gained inexplicable love
with Roy.
My hearing is going south but my spiritual ears are
more attuned. I’ve found quiet time is a good thing. In fact I crave it. Time
to meditate on the Word of God; how I can give more, love more and become more
like the Holy Spirit that hovers over me. Time to look back over the years; to
laugh and cry and give thanks to the One who got me through so many situations.
Time to ponder the future; to dream-build with Papa God and set my eyes on
where he is taking me.
I feel old(er) today. But still and yet God has a
plan for me. I’ve not finished the race, in fact have not even gotten to the
sprint yet. I’ve lived more years than I have left but I’ve learned to live
with abandonment; I say yes and no at will, dance even though I don’t look the
same in reality as I do in my mind’s eye, sing at the top of my lungs & wear
make-up as I please (oh yes, I appreciate those women who paint their faces
& draw in their eyebrows and lips).
I preach to whoever will listen, wax eloquent over
global issues, read the news & tell whoever is with me how they
(whoever they are) should fix
whatever I don’t agree with. I am no longer too concerned with being
politically correct because I have learned relevance is in the eyes of the
beholder. What I DO care about is that I do not grieve the Holy Spirit, that
anyone can tell I love Jesus just by my countenance, my words and my
actions.
So, 62 just happened.
In MY mirror I see a young girl brimming with hopes and dreams. I see
beauty the Lord created me with. I see Eve with her Adam trying to save a
nation and bring revival to a world in need. I see a teacher, a preacher, a
prophet, a missionary and a lover of life all encased in the wrinkles of a
good, full and incredibly happy woman.
Happy Birthday to me.
